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10 Books for Parents With Special Kids

By Dawn on May 21, 2013 Comments { 6 }

My apologies for being late with my Top 10 list today! I was out of town, helping my daughter deliver this:

So I’m a little sleep deprived, and more than a little bit sore from wrestling the laboring pregnant girl for 12 hours. Baby Girl was 7#2 oz. and 20” long. She’s healthy, nursing beautifully, and very bright eyed. I’m a happy Gramma.

So, I get a pass right?

Now on to what we’re here for….

10 Books for Parents With Special Kids

1. Carly’s Voice: Breaking Through Autismis about Carly Fleischmann, a young woman with severe autism who discovered a way to talk to her family, and the world, and hasn’t been silent since. If you don’t follow her on Facebook, you should. And read her book. She’s amazing.

2. In Jesse’s Shoes is a sweet book that you can use to help your “normal” kids and others to understand how special our special needs kids are. We own and love this book.

3. Social Rules for Kids isn’t specifically for special needs kids, but it could be! This book provides a way to purposefully teach your special kids—or any kids—the appropriate ways to respond to things in many varied social situations, from home to work, to family gatherings and beyond.

4. Homeschooling the Challenging Child: A Practical Guide is a helpful guide with lots of ideas to get you through—or continue to teach—your child with special needs. Often we know homeschooling is best for a particular child, but the challenge of doing so can be a surprise. Take heart! It can be done.

5. Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight: What to Do If You Are Sensory Defensive in an Overstimulating Worldoffers hope for the sensory sensitive kids and strategies for parents to help them.

6. Why Does Izzy Cover Her Ears? Dealing with Sensory Overloadis another book written for kids, to help them understand those who are different from them.

7. The Out-of-Sync Childis probably the best book on special needs, and particularly on sensory issues in kids, that I have ever read. I own it, I reread it about once a year, and I love it. Read it and when you recognize your child in the stories, take heart. It’s not a child manual, but it could be considered one.

8. No More Meltdowns: Positive Strategies for Managing and Preventing Out-Of-Control Behavior This book gives some helpful de-activation strategies as well as proactive parenting tips to help prevent what some parents live with as a daily reality.

9. Toilet Training for Individuals with Autism or Other Developmental Issues Potty training, eagerly discussed at length by parents of 1-3 year olds, becomes a taboo subject as children reach school age and others just don’t understand why you can’t seem to potty train your child. If you have an older child who isn’t toilet trained yet, here is some encouragement for you. You aren’t alone. (I was one of you. Feel free to email me if you are struggling.)

10. Views from Our Shoes: Growing Up With a Brother or Sister With Special NeedsIn all of our seeking out resources to help us with our differently abled children, we need to keep in mind that being the brother or sister of a special needs kid can be tough. 45 Siblings speak up here.

categories: Home & Family, Top Tens

Tags: Autism spectrum, parenting, PDD-NOS, special needs

Comments { 6 } :

More Discipline, or Just a New Normal

By Dawn on November 15, 2010 Comments { 18 }

Image credit: Stock XChng (by takuna)

I noticed her, as she sat there reading The Sensory-Sensitive Child. Titles like that always jump out at me because I’ve read a lot of those books, and of course I have my favorites too. I asked her if she had read The Out of Sync Child yet, which sparked a conversation.

“People tell me my son talks too much and is annoying. I am just surrounded by people who keep telling me I need to spank him more, or that I need more structure, more discipline, to do this or that better with him. They just DON’T UNDERSTAND MY SON.”

This was from a mom whose 7 year old son was just diagnosed Asperger’s Syndrome. We met in the waiting room of the therapy office where my boys get speech, OT and PT. What an overwhelming thing to have to jump into with both feet! This mom is trying to do her best. She is gathering her information and seeking to find out everything she can about what makes her son tick, so that they can be successful. She pulled him out of public school, because he wasn’t doing as well there as he needed to be. Now she is homeschooling, and others around her are so free with their opinions.

It is so easy to look in from the outside and give an opinion, but until you spend 24 hours in that home, with that child, you have no idea.

We have been at this for 10 years. Our 10 year old came to us as a newborn with special needs. We’ve been doing the OT/Speech routine for almost as many years as he has been alive. Our 8 year old too, has been in OT/PT for a couple of years. For us, it’s normal. It’s not YOUR normal, but it’s OUR normal. But this mom? She’s brand new to all of it, and her son is too. All she knows is that now she is starting to get information. Now she is starting to feel that there is at least some light ahead. Now she knows she’s not crazy. Or a bad mom.

Having a child with special needs is a new experience. It’s hard fluctuating between the relief of knowing what is wrong, and the negatives of “best case scenarios”, “expected prognosis”, and of course the opinions of every other person who has ever seen your kid throw a tantrum in public. And they, naturally, think you should just discipline him more. But what does your heart say?

It’s time for a new definition of normal. Normal is what ever routine you can establish that will help your child succeed and your household to function, hopefully all at once. Normal is what ever it takes to bring out the best in your child, without pulling out the last of your hair or despairing because she still can’t ______. (Fill in missing developmental step.)

Never forget that God made your child, and knows her. He knit her together within you (or her biological mother) and brought her into your family for you to raise and care for. He is not worried about her. He knows what you can do and He knows what you cannot do without Him.

So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

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