The blogging world often reminds me of high school—or even worse—junior high. There are cliques, and the fashionable people. We also have the more simple, the flamboyant, and the ones no one really knows at all. And there are always the people that everyone wants to imitate. All it takes to bring flashbacks from adolescence is the presence of a popular person, or popular blogger, in this case. The admirers clamor around her, wanting to be near her, or wanting to “catch” some of her popularity.
“She talked to me!”
“We had our pictures taken together and she signed a book for me!”
“Oh my gosh, she hugged you! What did she say to you?!”
Who ARE these people? They are Christians. Women. Bloggers. They get to meet someone they really look up to, and suddenly that other blogger has uber-Goddess status. Anyone who spends time with her receives a little bit of that uber-status too. It is hero worship in it’s purest form. I understand a little awe and all that, but this was surprising to behold.
Envy is alive and well in blogland. Why do we fall into it’s trap? It seems like so many bloggers want to be JUST LIKE a certain other blogger, to the point that, once they met her or heard her speak at a conference, they came back and changed their blogs or their writing, and now there are so many writing “like her” and I just wonder how many are authentic.
From what I know through her blog and her speaking, this blogger of whom I speak is a beautiful spirit, inside and out. She is humble and unassuming. I didn’t know who she was prior to that conference. I didn’t wait in line to meet her. I watched her. She was bewildered at the attention and even a bit shy. Seeing her uncomfortable made me uncomfortable. Most of the others didn’t seem to notice.
I didn’t meet her, but I needed to hear what she said. I needed to bring my priorities back into focus again, and she helped me to do that. She, as well as another speaker, helped me heal some rough places and have courage to tell some deeper truths, but I don’t want to BE them.
There are parts of her simple life that I long for. I love her ability to turn words into beauty and poetry and life. But I am very different from her. There are parts of my life that I love, too. She isn’t me, and I am not her. I write for myself, and I write for the Lord, but I’m not her. I’m me. Sometimes I splat my words down and sometimes a pour them from inside. It all depends on my mood. Either way I am using the gifts God gave me.
Yes, there are things that I long for, but God knows what I need. And as beautiful as she is, I don’t want to be her, or anyone else. I am very happy just being myself. I wish others would do the same. There is beauty in being who God created you to be. Whether you head to the Relevant Conference next week or stay home, please keep in mind that a transparent YOU is the best you can be.